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The Sex Appeal of High Heels

Jessica Rabbit from Disney's Who Framed Roger Rabbit

Jessica Rabbit from Disney’s Who Framed Roger Rabbit

There is no doubt about it. High heels are sexy. But why?

It likely has nothing to do with feet and everything to do with the up-turned ass that wearing these shoes creates (see dramatic Disney renditioning of the effect to the right).  Called “lordosis”, the posture is a universal signal of sexual readiness (probably something those 17th C. aristocratic dudes didn’t realize when they first adopted the fashion of wearing heels).

Cats do it, rats do it, even elephant seals do it.  It’s just that in the animal kingdom, such a stance comes as a spontaneous, hormon-driven response to the touch of a male, as opposed to a wardrobe selection.

According to the authors of the fabulous book, Zoobiquity, here is how it works: a nerve signal triggered by a mounting (or in some cases, gently touching) male sends a message to the female brain. Depending on where the female is in her cycle, levels of sex hormones relay the message to say “assume the position” if the female is receptive or “Clock him one and get the hell outta there” if the female is not so ready.

In cats, the response is really extreme and obvious. So too in rats and horses—a female may even lift her tail out of the way to expose herself.  It’s slightly more subtle in cows and primates. And in elephant seals, it takes a keen eye to spot.

Mating Northern Elephant Seal near San Simeon, CA

Mating Northern Elephant Seal near San Simeon, CA by Mike Baird

In this species, the female rarely outwardly solicits sex from the harem master (and who can blame her? Would you want 5000 lbs of hulking seal bubbler pressing you into the shifting sands?). But closer scrutiny shows she may subtly cue that she is ready by spreading her flippers and raising her rear when he lays a flipper across her back.  It’s slight, but it is definitely lordosis.

So, gentlemen attracted to the hot brunette in the six-inch red stilettos can feel in good company with a host of other mammalian males: it is a deep-rooted, primitive evolutionary response.

 

Which makes me wonder: could we create this effect in other species, too?

Walk_a_thon by William Wegman.

In other words, if it were possible to give a little lift to the rear of a female, would an otherwise uninterested male swoop in? Could it help captive breeding programs struggling to get endangered species to mate?  What would that look like? Come on designers… chime in.

 

 

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The world’s only disposable-re-growable penis-just in time for Valentine’s Day

Photo credit: xmatt

Photo credit: xmatt

Move over lizards. Re-growing a tail ain’t nothing compared to re-growing a penis—especially when it only takes 24 hours. And what strapping, brawny, stallion is man enough to un-man for a few moments and then regenerate an entirely new, functional member “all in a day’s work”?  None other than Chromodoris reticulata. It’s a sea slug, folks. And scientists yesterday just announced it is also the only known disposable-re-growable johnson on the planet.

Not only can they drop their penises, but, a back-up penis, ready for action, emerges within 24hrs.

Turns out, these slugs have a long, coiled structure that unfurls penis, after penis, after penis, for up to at least 3 mating bouts. All that is needed is a days rest in between.  That’s some serious sexual stamina.

But, why peel off the penis?

The sea slugs are hermaphrodites, and participate in reciprocal matings where each inserts a penis into the partners’ vagina.

Transparent penises of the hermaphroditic sea slug, S. quadrispinosum. From Lang et al. PLOS.doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0043234.g001

(This is a cool picture of a different species, showing the mutual mating tactic. p = penis. H= head of sea slug. s= stylet- a syringe like penis appendage that hypodermically stabs the other slug’s foot. More on this lovely mating duo to come).

It’s all quite civilized, really.  The thing is, though, this is likely not the only mating each slug has done recently.  Living in dense populations, they mate with each other ALOT. That means the female “side” of the slug may be storing sperm from several other suitors. So, as the male “side” retracts its penis after several minutes of mutual mating, tiny hooks along the penis head snag and ensnare sperm lining the vagina. This helps yank out the competition.

And, because a spiked penis is a bit difficult to retract (who wants to pull that sucker back inside their own body?), the slugs just ditch it, leaving their penis—and their competitor’s sperm—out to dry.  Having two more lengths of penis to unfurl means there is not too much to worry about in terms of lost mating opportunity.  Within 24hrs, they are ready to rock again.  Just goes to show how density of a population can select for some pretty crazy sexual strategies—where sperm competition isn’t so fierce, dudes tend to hang onto their dangles.

It must be tough for the guy to have to let go of his manly member. Even if he is also a she. Perhaps that’s why this strategy has only shown up in hermaphrodites: there’s enough female persuasion to get over any penis-attachement issues the male side may be holding on to…

 

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Nudibranchs Help Undress Human Sexuality

Two Nudibranchs getting cozy. Photo credit: Stephen Childs

Two Nudibranchs getting cozy. Photo credit: Stephen Childs

While my book, Sex in the Sea, focuses on the consequences of animal sex on sustainability, these tales of wet and wild habits can lend insight into understanding human sexuality as well. The article by gender professor, Eva Hayward, lays out the links between hermaphroditic and sex changing snails and her own personal sex-change journey. She notes:

“In general, we pretend sex is obvious, as if our chromosomes calculate our entire physiology. But as we’ve slowly come to realize—with the help of feminism, “queer theory,” and biology—sex is many processes that include X and Y chromosomes, hormones, gonads, internal sex structures, and external genitalia, as well as history, culture, environment, and variables still to be named. Some marine inverts “know” that sex is a process; know it as part of their way of life…”

The more I delve into the tales of Sex in the Sea, the more malleable and mysterious sex (and gender) appear– the mammalian condition of girl OR boy seeming an outlier among the vast variability that exists beneath the waves. And, as Hayward writes, this black and white conceptualization doesn’t hold for us, either:

“There is no direct relationship between a nudibranch and me—not even when I, a woman who was a fag-identified male seduced a man who was a lesbian-identified female. We are now married “heterosexuals” living in a swing state. But the nudibranch’s particular sexuality emerges from the same fundament as mine: life proliferates difference. I’m a woman with a transsexual history, because transsexuality is part of my species’ potential—by which I mean the web of relationships that make us human, like culture, environment, imagination, communication, and physiology. Transsexuality is just one way of being human, of being a thread in the web.”

Exploring the diversity of sexual strategies of marine life—and the consequences it has for ocean conservation—is the focus of my work. But, if sharing this information in an accessible, if not slightly kinky way, can help bring sustainability to oceans and foster greater appreciation for our own sexual diversity as a species (and its inherent “naturalness”), well then, that will be a great bonus, indeed.

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Your Salty Sex Stories Here

Thanks to those of you who have started to share your own experiences witnessing the wet and wild world of sea life sex. Blog posts of your tales will be coming up soon.. teasers include a shark sex cave, grouper sex as seen from a sub, and the time when sex looked like a sea monster… Thanks for sharing and keep ‘em coming

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Sea Urchin Eggs Play Hard to Get

Sea_Urchin_Purple_jkikhart35_FLICKR

Photo credit: jkirkhart35

There is a battle of the sexes raging beneath the waves and the outcome could lead to breakthroughs in our own sexual success. But this war is not waged between two fully matured, sexually primed adults. Instead, it is a match of molecules, a deft dance between the two most fundamental aspects of male and female: the sperm and the egg. And although it all plays out among the strange sex life of sea urchins, the scenario is all too familiar: guy (sperm) chases gal (egg), while she plays hard to get.

In the cold dark waters of the deep, a male sea urchin starts to spawn. His 10 to 100 billion sperm erupt forth in a milky cloud and begin their impossible race to find a tiny egg floating somewhere in the abyss. (Compared to the mere 280 million sperm per ejaculation of a human, sea urchin males seem pretty studly. Of course, they have to compete with dozens to hundreds of other males also releasing sperm into a very, very large ocean. Most men don’t tend to have that kind of intense competition, nor the relatively infinite space in which to find an egg, so no need for the enormous sperm count. So cheer up, chaps, it’s simply a situational thing). Of course, such spawning only occurs when other sea urchins are also close by (yes, in the sea, sex can be triggered by the proximity of your nearest neighbors. More on that phenomena, later). Female sea urchins sense the sperm and release about a million eggs each into the black waters.

When sperm bump into the egg, Viola! Fertilization occurs…sometimes.

_MG_4963

Close up of sea urchin spines and tube feet. Photo credit: julia_koefender

The trick is, the sperm has to match the egg perfectly, and she is mighty selective. These eggs are manufactured with some serious partner-scrutiny proteins that would make any over-protective father proud. When a sperm meets an egg it must match her protein configuration exactly, or it can’t get in.  Just like a lock and key.

If it is a good match, the sperm penetrates the egg and then the egg immediately constructs a defensive coating to prevent any other intruders. The door of opportunity slams shut.

However, if there are too many sperm around, more than one may sneak in before the barrier is up, and that is bad news for the egg. One sperm is all she can take—more than one and she dies.  So, eggs are constantly evolving to be highly selective, to keep down the number of sperm that could possibly match and enter her delicate sphere. Sperm on the other hand, are constantly evolving to fit the latest lock eggs configures—kind of like trying to keep up with never-ending software updates.  But this is a battle of the sexes at the most fundamental level.

And from this tantalizing tango comes our most thorough understanding of how fertilization actually works—from proteins to the influence of sperm number on egg health, sea urchins have provided the peep show into the minute and marvelous world of egg-sperm coupling. Because the same proteins are found on human and other mammal eggs, understanding egg-sperm compatibility in sea urchins may pave the way to better understanding of human fertilization down the road.

Uni sushi. Photo credit: coolinsights

Uni sushi. Photo credit: coolinsights

So the next time you are glomming down some uni (sea urchin roe) in your favorite sushi joint, take a minute to thank those little eggs not only for their taste, but for what they’ve taught us about sex.

 

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Animal Sex is High Art

The exhibit “The Sex Lives of Animals” at the Museum of Sex in New York proves that this subject is high art. And, note: the focus isn’t on esoteric science-y theory of sexual strategies or evolution stuff either. It’s on how animals have sex for fun. Turns out, we are not the only ones who do it for the pleasure.

The question I have is—how many marine species are featured here? Will have to make sure I check out the scene for myself in December when I am back in NYC.  For now, I am enjoying scrolling through the pictures of the awesome sculptures and feeling redeemed knowing that Sex in the Sea is one hell of a classy subject…

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Sea Turtles are STUDS

Sea Turtle Sex by eric.surfdude

Poor turtles. Slowness, a rather wrinkly exterior, and the tendency to duck into their shells rather than face a threat like a man,   all contribute to the male turtle’s reputation as a less-than-studly beast. Compared to say, their cousins the saltwater croc or even a rooster, these reptiles seem, well, kind of wimpy. But, as Darren Naish so nobly argues in the Terrifying Sex Organs of Male Turtles, these ancient tetrapods are hung in a way that would humble Dirk Diggler.  And sea turtles are no exception. A green sea turtle (C. mydas) with a shell length of 80-110 cm often sports a sword well over 30 cm. We’re talking a two-foot long johnson.  And the mighty leatherback? Well, just check out the pictures in Naish’s article. And these penises aren’t just for show.

When it comes to sex, sea turtles are no stranger to long bouts of arduous armorous activity. Males will mount a female from above, using two front claws and a hook on the tail to establish a tripod attachment. He then proceeds to hang out here for hours or even days at a time. Should a female not wish to engage, she can simply rest on the seafloor and consign the hopeful suitor to hours of circling above.  Or, she can fold her rear flippers together (its the equivalent of the universal crossed legs and arms signifying “not interested” used by single ladies everywhere).

So determined (and non-lazy) are these males, however, that a single male often will latch onto the back of a mating couple. Kind of pointless, but at least he’s trying. And it makes for some spectacular turtle towers. Occasionally, these additional mounts knock off the first male, opening up opportunity for the late comers–pun intended.

And while male mating efforts and physiology are impressive, the females are pretty damn tough too. Hauling several hundred pounds of heft out of the water, up an incline, and through sifting sands to dig nests and lay eggs above the high tide line requires some serious stamina and strength. Rising sea levels make this already significant endeavor even more challenging: females have to go higher up the beach or risk having their nests flooded, drowning the hatchlings. But that’s not the only impact of global warming.  Sea turtle sex is determined by temperature. Warmer sand means more females, cooler sand leads to more males. If people worked this way, summer babies would tend to be girls and the winters full of boys.  Kind of a crazy concept, but its common for many non-mammal species. And, as the globe heats up, the sea turtle sex ratios will start to skew, threatening future survival of the species.

Despite their slow and shy demeanor, there is evidently quite a lot of gusto in the form of some mighty male members among turtles across the board.  And at least for sea turtles, the females impressively rise to their own occasion, too. Makes you wonder what else is hiding beneath those shells…

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Squid’s Sex Requires Stamina and a Nap

ImageThere’s nothing dumpy about dumpling squid sex. Measuring a mere three inches long (we’re talking body length here), they engage in three hour sex bouts. That is an hour of sex per inch. If we were equipped with such sexual stamina, we’d be doing it for three days straight!

Males appear to attempt to mate whenever possible, reaching out and grabbing the female from underneath, holding her close and tight for the entire time. It’s a tentacle spectacle, made psychedelic by the flashing iridescence of the pair’s skin which can shift from golden, sandy tones to deep blue and purple with bright green and orange speckles.

But the active amor comes at a price. According to a recent study, after all that affection, the squid are simply wiped out. It shouldn’t be a surprise, really, but the paper claims to be the “first time the energetic costs of mating have been shown to affect physical abilities after mating.” (Obviously, this statement excludes people. Cosmo has covered this topic in humans for years). The work noted it could take up to 30 minutes for the squid to regain normal swimming activity.  That’s a significant energetic cost that could result in lost time for foraging or increased risk of predation.  But, the risk to reward ratio seems to pay off for these little cephalopods, and the same type of strategy is expected in related species.

This means there are likely dozens of squid species out there all conducting copulatory marathons followed by a half-hour of down time. Just enough time for that post-coitus cigarette and snooze before attempting round two.

Photo credit: David Hershman

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Happy Mother’s Day to One of the most dedicated mom’s on the planet

***In honor of mother’s day, today we stray a bit from just the sex, to include a phenomenal act of motherhood by the largest invert on the planet. But don’t worry. There’s still some sex. Here’s to you, Giant Pacific Octopus moms.***

The original octo-mom has been juggling a multitude of kids for millenia. Tens of thousands of them at a time.  One by one she lays over 50,000 fertilized eggs and with meticulous care, links them together like so many strings of pearls. Attaching them to the roof of her den, they hang, swaying in the current she provides by blowing water out her siphon.  There she sits, for months, fending off any potential predators and breathing life into her young. Her massive might slowly dwindles away until, when she senses the time is right, she rallies for one last mighty effort, blowing her eggs out of their cozy den and into the wild beyond. For the Giant Pacific Octopus, this dedicated act of maternal care costs the mother her life.

In the cold dark waters off Seattle’s coast, Seainggreen captured the incredible sight of the hatchlings venturing forth into the big blue for the first time—perfect miniatures of their gigantic mother.  Her large stature (some reach up to 16ft in length) makes her delicate work to rear her young all the more impressive.

It’s the ultimate sacrifice, and as is pretty typical of nature, its the coup de grâce of a less-than spectacular night of sex.

Don’t get me wrong. Male octopods invest a bit of time and energy selecting and then guarding their chosen mates (a fact only recently discovered. Until a few years ago, they were thought to be more of the hit-it-an-quit-it type of species). Big boys favor big girls (who have more eggs) and thus, there can be some intense battles—sometimes, the male has to chase off competition while in the act.  Impressive, yes, though its probably easier than you might think given he’s got seven arms to fight with and only one that needs to tend to his lady.

Turns out that male octopus are righties—at least when it comes to sex. The third arm on the right is the one that delivers the sperm packet. Rather than suckers, this hectocotylus (octopus have names for their units, too) has a groove where a string of sperm can ooze on out. All the male needs to do is insert the tip under the mantle of the female. Groovy indeed.  Such encounters can be fleeting, or last a few hours. In some related species—such as the paper nautilus—this modified male appendage actually detaches. Its fancy penis-work indeed. For the Giant Pacific Octopus, though, its just a quick thrust up and under.  Visually, its rather psychedelic: a flurry of 16 rapidly color-changing arms undulating, twisting, and gliding over the seafloor.

But at the end of the day, the most remarkable feat of octopus sex isn’t really the sex at all. Its what the female endures 4-5 months later.

As many authors have noted, it is an event both uplifting and sad—celebration at the birth of thousands of new lives, tempered by the knowledge that their mighty mom will soon crawl out of her cave to die. But, man, what a sight it is.  Enjoy. And Happy Mother’s Day.